Sunday, June 30, 2013

Mother pus bucket!

I've finished four weeks of marathon training, and here is what I've learned so far:

During the week, marathon training is awesome. You have "easy" days and cross-training days, and your daily runs aren't too terribly far. You're not too tired, and yet you still get to post things on Facebook about how you're training for a marathon and then get on Pinterest and pin tips about how to carbo-load.

Oh, and I ordered a cute shirt, which I immediately photographed and posted on Facebook. In fact, it is now my profile picture:

In case anyone on Facebook forgot I'm training for a marathon, I can subtly remind them.

Most of my runs during the week are on the treadmill in the air conditioning, and I get to watch DVDs of Blue Bloods. This is the best dang show on television, not because of the writing or acting, but because it has what no other show has: Donnie Wahlberg. In a suit. Running.

Run with me, Karen. Run with me.

So the weekdays are all happy and filled with cute shirts and Donnie running, and then the weekend comes. Then it's time to drag myself out of bed at the crack of dawn and run 12 miles in the heat while trying not to throw up, and suddenly the happy week is gone, and I'm all, "MOTHER PUS BUCKET!"


Tuesday, June 25, 2013

Myeloma Mom is back!

My June Myeloma Beacon column is now online! Go check it out here. And if you're a fan of Tim McGraw ... well ... I am sorry.

Tuesday, June 11, 2013

Thank you, Hazel!

A few weeks ago, I wrote about how great it would be to have a sunbonnet to wear while running. It would keep the sun off of me and the strap would keep it from blowing away. The only issue was finding a sunbonnet made from moisture-wicking material that wouldn't get sweaty.

Imagine my surprise when I opened my mailbox yesterday and found a package from Hazel, a very sweet blog reader from Colorado. I have never met Hazel, but she actually sewed me a sunbonnet made from moisture-wicking material and sent it to me in the mail.

Seriously, how awesome is this?

Laura Ingalls Wilder would have been unstoppable with moisture-wicking fabric!

I decided to get into full running gear and don the bonnet to see how it would look. I'm thinking it looks pretty great.

It's too bad Mary went blind and can't see my fabulous bonnet!

The bonnet is hugely practical. It offers tons of sun protection that you just can't get from a regular hat, and it won't blow away. Still, I'm working up the courage to wear it out running in public. Not because it's not a well-made, attractive bonnet, but because you just don't see other runners wearing bonnets these days. Jay said if I'm not going to wear it running, he's going to wear it to mow the lawn.*

Anyway, receiving the bonnet made my day. Maybe I'm not a world-famous writer, but I doubt that, say, Stephen King ever had anyone send him a custom-made, moisture-wicking sunbonnet. Take that, Stephen King!

*Yes, I will get a photo of that, should that occur.

Sunday, June 02, 2013

I need a respirator 'cause I'm runnin' out of breath ...

I did it! Today is the final day of my 32-day blog-athon! If you are still reading all of my nonsense, thank you for sticking with me. Now, let us all celebrate with a joyful song:

Saturday, June 01, 2013

The ants go marching one by one, hurrah.

The wildlife siege on the House of Pain continues. This time, we have a vast ant colony in our mailbox. It seemed to spring up overnight. Yesterday, WCK and I took the hose and sprayed all of the ants out of the mailbox. I actually felt kind of bad as they washed away in what must have seemed to them a Biblical flood. Still. Build your house in a hole in the ground like normal ants, ants! Our mailbox is entirely inappropriate for your colony.

Today, less than 24 hours later, I opened the mailbox to find the colony had again rebuilt itself overnight, bigger and stronger than before. All 10,000 ants turned to look at me and then flipped me the bird.

Jay suggested we use some poison. It makes me feel a little evil, but, yeah, it needs to be done.

Poison will put them to sleep. Sleeeeeeep. Now they'll sleeeeep.
Shortly after this conversation, we were leaving to go somewhere and WCK yelled to me from the driveway, "MOM, DID YOU PUT THE POISON IN THE MAILBOX YET??"

I bet we get zero trick-or-treaters this year.