Thursday, December 15, 2011

Beware wiglee adic!

These days, kindergartners and first graders are encouraged to use something called "best-guess spelling", where they write things completely on their own, spelling everything phonetically. I've discovered that, as a parent, translating best-guess spelling is an art form. It's like playing a complex word game while trying to read your child's mind at the same time. Because word games and child mind-reading are at the top of my short list of skills, I've gotten pretty good at reading WCK's best-guess spelling. For example, yesterday she came home with this story she'd written all by herself:

"I like Cirmus. Cirmus is the best tim fo the yer. It adout babbe Jesus's brthday and the sar shn doa war he lad."

Translation= "I like Christmas. Christmas is the best time of the year. It's about baby Jesus' birthday, and the star shined down where he laid."*

* I know it should be "lay", but check out how she knew to use an apostrophe with "Jesus." Not too shabby.

Anyway. A few days ago, some packages addressed to Jay arrived from Amazon. Jay and WCK immediately smuggled the packages upstairs to his office and shut the door. A short while later, WCK came out and told me I was not to go into the closet. Shortly after that, an illustrated best-guess-spelling sign went up on the closet door:



I thought I had gotten pretty good at best-guess spelling, but this one had me stumped for the longest time. Jay and I puzzled and puzzled over this sign. I got the "NO MOM!", but what is "wigleeadic?" Is that person me? If so, what is falling on my head and making me go, "AAAAAAA!"?

I was ready to give up, when all of a sudden it all made sense.

The opening to our attic is in the ceiling of this closet. WCK was warning me that we have a "wiglee adic" (wiggly attic), and if I go into the closet, it will fall on my head.

Well, thank goodness she warned me. I sure hope that attic door doesn't fall on the Christmas presents that are hidden in there, though.

Sunday, December 11, 2011

She's a little runaway

WCK, for reasons unknown, says she doesn't like going to movies. So when her cruel, heartless, evil, wicked parents announced that they wanted to take her to see The Muppets, she ran to her room and started packing a bag so she could run away from home.

Jay had a talk with her, and he finally convinced her to come out of her room and endure the horror of watching The Muppets while eating a bag of movie theater fruit snacks. She survived. She might have even enjoyed it a little bit.

When I inspected her "runaway bag", I found it contained pajamas, a pair of pink sparkly pants, a Princess Leia wig, and several pairs of sunglasses. I asked why she needed so many sunglasses.

"Oh, I don't know," she said. "I was thinking of heading somewhere warm."

Looking back, I probably should have questioned the Princess Leia wig instead of the sunglasses.

She doesn't know it yet, but this is the story that will haunt her for the rest of her life. We'll all be sitting around at her college graduation: "Remember when you tried to run away from home because you didn't want to see The Muppets? Ha ha ha ha!"

Thursday, December 01, 2011

Woo hoo, part two

I had great test results this month! White cells are holding steady, hemoglobin is in the normal range for the first time in I don't know how long, and M-spike is down a teeny bit to 2.1. It's a great way to start getting into the holiday mood.