Sunday, April 26, 2009

Standin' at The Pearlies

I'm pretty lucky to have such positive, encouraging doctors. I've mentioned before that I signed up as a "Patient-to-Patient" volunteer with the International Myeloma Foundation. The foundation gives my name and number to newly diagnosed patients, and they can call me to talk about the diagnosis. I've only talked to two people so far, but I really enjoy doing it. I think I help the callers feel a little bit better by the end of the conversation. Last week, I got a call from a woman in Boston. She was the friend of someone who has just been diagnosed with myeloma. She told me her friend didn't want to do any research or seek out any support herself, because she was simply too distraught and overwhelmed. Among other things, her doctor had told her she had just three years to live.

Why do doctors do that? Why?

The next day, I ended up having a long talk with Dr. GPO, who started talking about how nobody ever knows how long they have to live. "Hey," he said, "somebody makes a bad left turn after work today, and I'm standin' at The Pearlies."

Standin' at The Pearlies. Dr. GPO cracks me up.

In other myeloma news, I made my call to the Speak-n-Spell lady at the Celgene corporation today. In case you've just started reading the blog, I have to call the drug company every four weeks and take a computerized survey to let them know that I'm not pregnant, thinking about becoming pregnant, or even making direct eye contact with pregnant women. The "person" asking these questions is actually a computerized voice, like the one that came out of those Speak-n-Spell toys in the '80s.

Anyway, there is a good chance that that was my last call to the Celgene Corporation. I think I'm going to miss my monthly chats with Speak-n-Spell Lady. After all, we've talked at least 25 times. My favorite question is, "Have you had your womb or uterus surgically removed? Press 'one' for 'yes', 'two' for 'no', or 'three' for 'don't know.'"

Seriously? If you are pressing three on this question, you have bigger problems than myeloma.

3 comments:

John said...

25 cycles of Rev and you still have your sense of humor. That's a new category of survivorship! Congratulations will soon be in order.

Anonymous said...

I think it is wonderful of You to offer comfort and Knowledge to newly diagnosed patients.
Dan

Sunshine said...

You, Dear, are the most likely source of my laughter in any day!
Bless you!