Monday, March 19, 2007

Fairies vs. Squirrels

Years before I had WCB, I looked forward to having kids so I could tell them fanciful stories: Santa is coming. The Easter Bunny is coming. The Land of Oz is a real place that we all hope to visit one day, and that's why we never go to the basement during tornado warnings.

Actually, the last one is a cold, hard fact, and if you try to tell me otherwise, I will kick you in the knee.

Anyway. Today WCB and I were playing in the back yard, and we found a little top part of an acorn. I told her it was a hat for fairies to wear. She smiled, put it on her head, and said, "Hat!" I suddenly found that I didn't get the satisfaction that I thought lying to my child would bring me. I got a little panicky. I tried to cover myself by adding, "... and ... it is also something for squirrels to eat." Suddenly I had this image of WCB taking the ACT test in 16 years, and I saw her coming across the following question:

What is this?

A. A hat for fairies to wear
B. Food for squirrels

I mean, what if the answer to that one question makes the difference between a full ride to Harvard and a lifelong career as a Wal-Mart greeter?

I tried to make up for the whole affair by explaining that the rocks in the back yard are sedimentary, but I think the damage has been done.


gina said...

Dear Karen:
I cannot tell you how many times I visit your site to be uplifted and entertained. I quote your hilarious stories if not provide links to your site in emails. Ever consider freelance writing? Your perspective and sense of humor have broad appeal to parents everywhere. Here's a mommy site that I think would love you. They are part of a national network, so your writing would be seen everywhere. And I also, of course, love the opportunity to raise awareness about myeloma... KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK - in all fronts.

Posted: Fri Mar 16, 2007 10:57 am Post subject: Writers Needed!


::Writer Submission Guidelines and The Mommies Network welcome submissions from writers.

Articles should be between 500 and 1200 words. Articles should relate in some way to motherhood and the aspects of motherhood (children, pregnancy, etc.), organization or decorating, home management, or holidays (crafts, safety tips, decorative ideas, etc.). These articles will be considered for multiple websites throughout the United States and may be available to more than one website at a time.

You may also write about events and activities within in the immediate vicinity, but these articles will be limited to only.

In return, we will provide in return a 50 word by-line, which may include a link to your personal site.

To submit an article, please send an email to and attach your article in Word or PDF format to the email. Please provide your by-line at the end of your article.

Thank you for your interest in writing for and The Mommies Network.

Karen's sister said...

No! You must keep telling her those silly stories! Just the other day I told WCBII that the steam coming up from the steam tunnels under the alley near our house was from the trolls cooking their dinner. Remember when Nanny (our grandma - for those of you who aren't family members) told us not to step on the baby pine trees because if we did the Mamma pine tree would come in the night and needle us to death? Wasn't that fun? I figure we have to keep the tradition alive.

Karen's sister said...

Oh and one more thing... I'm beginning to really wonder about the Harvard v. Wal-mart comparison. There are some real weirdos in the academic world who would love fairy hats. Once someone commented on the fact that there weren't any nutty, crazy people wandering the streets of our college town. My response, "Right, because they all have offices and tenure." So I'd say that believing in fairy hats would give WCB a leg up on getting into the ivy league.

Sandra said...

Here's one: The little droplets of rain that hang from the clothesline, gutter or chain link fence are mouse socks.

Also, I've started playing a game with my 18 mo when we're almost home (20-minute drive to town) and he's getting cranky. I start in on "The Secret Life of Jack" (our dog.) "What do you think Jack is doing? Do you think he's cooking? Do you think he's playing with your blocks?" I'll ask. I think WCBIII is a visual thinker because he just giggles and giggles at the thought of Jack doing human things. Of course, I knew that my stuffed animals came to life when I wasn't looking, so there's a family history of this stuff.

David E said...

Add eyes, a nose and a mouth and it's a little French guy!

Karen's mom said...

AKA Karen's sister's mom and Grandma (Me-ma) to WCB's I and II who are actually clones of their mothers...but I digress.

Karen, when you were 3 and your sister was a baby, we would play "What's the baby doing?" and you would say things like "Riding a bike" or "Cooking dinner" or "driving the car." But I would have to agree that it was your grandmother (Nanny) who inspired your imaginations the most.


Margaret said...

Dear Karen, your Florence Henderson haircut story cracked me up (I used to love the Brady Bunch...shhht!), then came the Fairies/Squirrels, and I had to stop reading! Thank you so much!
I just created a health blog (I have SM), and I added your blog link to my blogroll. Hope you don't mind! My blog is:
Thanks! And keep us laughing! :-)Margaret