Monday, May 08, 2006

Sexy camel leg hair

I've been thinking about popular music lately for a couple of reasons.

Last night, WCB opened the drawer that holds all of our CDs and flung them out onto the floor one by one. Jay and I were horrified, not because of the mess she was making, but because we noticed that we apparently haven't purchased a new CD since 1995. As the pile mounted, it soon became clear that we are Officially Lame. Hootie and the Blowfish? Jewel? Alanis Morissette? Are these people even still alive? And don't get me started on Jay's Boyz II Men collection.

Then there are a few that defy explanation. The Monkees' Greatest Hits? I know that one is mine, but I don't know why. We're going to have to get a baby-proof lock on that drawer, not just to keep WCB out, but to keep the Lameness Vibes from oozing all over the rest of the house.

Now for the second reason I've been thinking about music: A few posts ago, I wrote about how much I like stupid song parodies. Someone named Spechtster left the following comment:

Along the lines of stupid song parodies... I read an article about a guy who thought the Rolling Stones' "Beast of Burden" lyrics were actually "Never... Leave... Your Pizza Burnin'"!

Ah! Misunderstood lyrics! The equally funny cousin of stupid song parodies! I once had a professor who admitted he always thought "Do the Hustle!" was really "Tuna hotdog!" I used to work with a girl who thought the chorus of "Rock Me Amadeus" went, "Hot potatoes, hot potatoes ... hot potatoes ..."

Then there's me. About eight years ago, there was a song called "Sex and Candy" that played on the radio every five seconds. (I just looked it up online. It was by a one-hit wonder group called Marcy Playground and spent 15 weeks at number one). The chorus went, "I smell sex and ... can-day here ..." but for months I was convinced they were actually singing, "I smell sexy ... camel leg hair ..."

Seriously.

I'm admitting this, because I know I can't be the only one. I'm inviting you all to send me your own tales of misunderstood lyrics -- the other "sexy camel leg hairs" that have occurred in your own music-listening lives. C'mon. You know you want to.

In the meantime ... Tuna hotdog! Doo doo doo doo dooodooodooodooodooo ....

13 comments:

tk said...

Still trying to think of some misunderstood lyrics. You think your CD collection is lame, most of ours are all oldies that replace the ones we used to have on vinyl. Remember vinyl, I hope?

Lizard Eater said...

Reverend Blue Jeans.

See, Neil Diamond's "Forever in Blue Jeans" came out at the time that *I* was watching Captain Kangaroo. Remember Mr. Green Jeans?

And his friend ... the Reverend Blue Jeans, Babe.

And the not-misheard, just what-a-dope-I-was ... I thought "Nights In White Satin" was "Knights in White Satin." I could see them, in white satin suits and everything.

Let my dork flag fly.

John Wagner said...

Creedence Clearwater Revival's Bad Moon Rising:

I always heard, "there's a bathroom on the right" instead of the real lyrics, "there's a bad moon on the rise." Even today, if I listen to that song, that is all I can hear.
(Hmm, when I first typed that, I typed "Clearance" instead of "Creedence." Maybe I even misheard their name.)

John Wagner said...

Oh, and I still have LOTS of vinyl records, mostly 33rpm but a few 45's and even a couple of 78s. And we even still have lots of reel-to-reel tapes but the tape deck is broken now and I don't know where to get it repaired. Wish I had my grandmother's cylinder records and player or even her glass, one-sided records and crank Victrola I listened to as a kid. I have very few CDs. OK, yes I am old!

And one more lyric. In the Christmas song, We Wish You a Merry Christmas, the lyric is "Now bring me some figgy pudding" and my grandson thought it was "Now bring me some friggin' pudding." I mean, who knows what figgy pudding is?

DavidE said...

Thanks Karen - I always look to your blog for a smile.

John took mine! In my current condition it's good to know that there is always a bathroom close!!!

Karen's sister said...

I remember when you built your CD collection in college, which might explain the Monkees CD... remember how you would sign up for the record clubs and get something like 10 free CDs? One membership perk was that if one of your friends signed up, you AND your friend also got ten MORE free CDs. I think at one point you signed me up and kept my CDs, seeing that I didn't own a CD player and was happy to let you keep them. However, if I remember right, your goldfish enthusiastically signed up and also got free CD's. Then, luckily, when the goldfish passed on, they left their entire collections to you. I'm betting it was the goldfish who selected the Monkees, out of respect to the animal kingdom.

Rachel said...

Okay, that song, "Blinded by the light, revved up like a Deuce, another runner in the night" by Manfred Mann's Rare Earth Band (so Alex tells me)? I've always ALWAYS heard it as "Blinded by the light, wrapped up like a douche..." I took a poll in my living right now, and 2 out of 3 people heard the same thing! So I'm not crazy.

Jennifer B said...

YES. I agree with Rachel-That's what I hear when I listen to that song, too!

Anonymous said...

Just catching up on some reading and am crying from laughing so hard. I thought I was the only one "lyrically challenged"! A radio station here in KC used to have a contest to decipher Elton John lyrics - even after hearing the real lyrics, I can't tell you what he's singing! One of the most well-known is Jimi Hendrix: "Excuse me, while I kiss this guy!"

here's a link to a book you would love - have WCB order it for Mother's Day!

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0613165543/qid=1147374962/sr=2-1/ref=pd_bbs_b_2_1/102-7304359-1834529?s=books&v=glance&n=283155

Thanks for the laugh . . . God Bless.

Anonymous said...

What fun!

As a kid, I thought "Smooth Operator" was "Sue Bopparetta" - some girl's name. And I still hear it - had to sing it a couple of times to remember what the words REALLY were just now.

"Sue bopparetta.. Suuuuuuue Bopparetta...."

Karen's husband said...

These were so hilarious that I had to write. The Anonymous post about Jimi Hendrix 'excuse me' lyric is so true!

I remember the Smashing Pumpkins song that came out in the 90's... "In spite of my rage, I'm still just a rat in a cage." I spent one summer in college working with a guy who swore Billy Corgan actual sang, "In spite of my rage, I'm still just a cat in braids!"

I would think a cat with braids would have definitely have some rage to deal with.

deanna said...

To me, the Indigo Girls' song that goes, "I wish I was a nomad, an Indian or saint ..." always sounded like, "I wish I was a snowman ..."

spechtster said...

Many thanks to all of you who made me laugh so hard I almost wet myself! Here's to "I smell sexy camel leg hair." WTH? That's hilarious.

Now bring me some friggin' pudding! Rock on, misunderstood lyrics.