On Friday, I took World's Cutest Baby to the doctor for her nine-month checkup. Everything looks great, but the doctor freaked out when I told her WCB isn't crawling yet. She gave me the phone number of a state-run program called "First Steps" and wants WCB evaluated for a developmental delay.
What? Apparently Doctor Freakout didn't get the memo that WCB is perfect in every way.
So I called the program, and the woman I spoke to said she didn't think WCB would qualify (See??), but they're going to send someone to look at her anyway. (It's free, and they come out to the house). Now we just have to wait for the Crawling Lady to call us and set up an appointment.
About 99.9 percent of me feels that there's nothing wrong with her; the other .1 percent has visions of her calling me from Harvard in 18 years, sobbing because her Brit Lit final is the next day and she can't crawl across her dorm room to reach her copy of "Beowulf".
And an even smaller part of me says, "Harvard? She's going to be living in a VAN down by the RIVER."
So we wait for the Crawling Lady.
In other news, on Friday it was close to 70 degrees! In February! In Missouri! I, however, had to spend a good chunk of the afternoon indoors, calling back and forth between my insurance company and the Mayo Clinic. Mayo said nobody has paid them; the insurance company said they totally have. I swear, there is some giant vortex in the center of the universe and all of my insurance payments are being sucked into it.
It was also interesting to call my insurance company, because they operate almost entirely on a voice-activated automated system. ("If you're calling about a medical claim, say, 'One.'") Every time WCB would make one of her infamous "I'm a Happy Girl!" shrieks in the background, it would completely confuse the computer and send me spinning off into some random part of the system. I'm not sure what she told them. I think their records show my name is Mother Shabubu now.
But I got everything straightened out (I think!), and WCB and I were able to go for a long walk through the neighborhood. Ah. Life is good.